Howzatt?

Everyone's talking about Aisam-Ul-Haq. 

It amuses and saddens me at the same time.

A common man's jumma prayers tomorrow will probably be for a victory for Aisam. I feel happy because after a long long long time we, as a nation, have something to feel proud of. 

My heart feels a little heavy because ever since I can remember, we've always been brought up to rank cricket above everything else. Any other sport, even if it is hockey, our national sport comes after cricket. Even if that very sport leads us to be termed as a corrupt nation. We still carry the love for cricket in our blood. Maybe many of those who actually follow tennis know him but for me, the common citizen, who was raised with the ABC of cricket and just cricket, it was news.

The guy has been playing professionally since 1998, won many competitions and other things that his Wikipedia page mentions and yet its only after 12 years that we see him as of any importance to the nation. Tennis shall only hit headlines in this country when either Sania Mirza decides to marry Shoaib Malik or now when Aisam's in the finals.

This undermining, bias and just sheer ignorance of the talent within our country is holding us back from reaching the sky. We are a nation filled with skill, talent and most of all dreams, which given a chance can make us an enviable land. But its just that our importance only shows when we are about to make our nation look good in the international media.

All i can say is that i really hope he wins because that would just be the perfect eidee for the nation.

Peace :)

From the benches.

The juniors strutted in today, with their big smiles and perfect hair for their first day.

A few bitch looks here and there. A few we returned a few we ignored.

Air kissing everywhere.

And giggling. How old are you? 12? -__-

Faces that looked at you and turned away because they didn't want the seniors to notice them.

And faces which i just didn’t like much. I think i already hate a few of them.

Even though i have no extreme attachment to my school, it was still my turf since a year. I didnt have to look around for an empty bench or stand till someone called out loud to come to a bench.

So i sat there, on one bench all day. Because the benches are sacred. They determine classes. The seniors and the juniors.

It felt weird.

Maybe because I couldn’t rag them.

But really, it was just because I couldn’t remember my first day. 

I felt a sudden urge to rewind back. Something hit me from inside, because my first day was only a year ago. If that could be forgotten to easily then what will I remember when I leave?

Ambivalence. Right there. This feeling in my stomach. I think that's where my actual, real feelings are or maybe it was just the fries i ate =/

Flick, already!

For some odd reason i thought that after turning 18, my life would magically change. Like Cinderella's! Once the slipper fits she'd be living the perfect life! But I'm still the same. Although, with softer hair because of the eggs smashed on my head. But, nevertheless, I am still the same.

The week before the birthday was shit.

The week after was shit.

And probably the weeks after this week will be shit too.

And now i could list a million things that went wrong. A week before "my big day" to today, a week after it.

But i wont. Because the day that mattered the most was awesome.

I had 3 cakes, 3 different sets of friends all with me that day and everything seemed so perfect!

But when the night ended it really didn't seem like anything was different. And the celebration of turning 18 seemed insignificant.

I was Cinderella in my head again, not wearing the slipper now. Just the clock striking midnight. My cart and horses turned back into a pumpkin and rats.

The bottom line is, one day cant change your life. Turning 18 wont flick a switch in my brain. Even though i really want something to flick.. 

I need my stars to seriously stop vacationing now and come to the rescue when i need them.

So God. Please flick that switch. Soon? Please?